Loved And Lost

People say, "Its better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all"

But I have not come across any learned person who can preach/teach/advise on the experience of "Losing in Love". You love someone, truely, very truely; that someone also loves you, truely, very truely...or so he claims. And time rolls by... over the time, your relationship matures... and then? then he starts taking you for granted, and you get used to it. He starts losing interest in you, and you get used to it. He lies to you, and you get used to it. Initially it starts as compromise and adjustment, then you rrealize things have gone too far out of control. He lies are regular, his ignoring you is more evident than ever... and then, then what? Like two educated, matured individual, you seem to be realizing the existance of a potential threat...a problem...a disease...yes, your relationship is ill now... you two "talk it out" in order to sort out...now, how do you do that? Again, call it modernization, or the power of education, or whatever you feel like...you analyze, you two look back, list the problems and try to find out solutions to them... but yes, thats where I guess you two are wrong...you look for problems, but not their root cause.... however, since you two dont relaise that, you concentrate on finding solutions to your problems. Now lets say, you figured out the following problems in your relationship:
a)
b)
c)
d)
To these problems, you map some solutions, which are:
A)
B)
C)
D)
And both of you genuinely work on them... the solutions, ie,... one day, two days, a week, two weeks...perfect... just when you feel a sense of achievement that you have saved your relation... things go wrong again... you again realize, he is again hiding truths, he is again not paying you enough attention, he is again.... (ok, this is applicable both ways, I mean please dont think of me as a pucca feminist here, though that I am, but here, its not about that, so please...just for my convenience am writing "him" here, it can be "her" or "both" as well)...so coming back to the main point, yes the symptoms appear again... your relationship is again ill.... again the process continues... now my question, HOW LONG?

If you are patient, you will give this many more shots... but soon you will notice, that the solution that you guys work out are all temporary... symptoms re-appear...may be their forms differ...but if you analyze you will find familiar traits in them... have you ever realized, that if you are hit by viral every month, then what happens to you? you become weak, right? in a similar way, your relationship also becomes weaker and weaker with this continuous illness, which keeps appearing almost every 2-3 weeks...

Pathetic situation, isnt it...but look into your life... you will find it similar, and if you dont, you are really lucky, my friend.

You are still in love, for sure, but you are not sure if the other person is...you care for the "relationship" - but the other person? does he? you keep banging your head on everything, and keep on asking everything you come across with... WHAT WENT WRONG??? but do you always get the answer?

Thats when... You are in Love, but you have lost it... thats where I am now...am in love...but I have lost it.