Emotional Atyachaar

My morning begins with Times Of India...well actually it begins with a yawn, followed by internal Shakespearrean conflict of "to get up or not to get up"...but after I get up...or pushed from my bed literally...my day begins with TOI. And when I began my morning on the first day of a new decade, my eyes fell upon the first page of the TOI, I chancedupon the announcement of a new initiave : Aman ki Aasha (read, emotional atyachaar)

I dont drink, so I really dont know what a hangover on the 1st of January is, but am sure it could not be any different from what I was going through reading that page. Accepted and understood that we entered a new decade, accepted and understood that we need to be different. Accepted and understood that life moves on and that "to err is human and to forgive is divine"...but the past decade that witnessed so much of terrorism, started with the attacks on our Parliament and ended with 26/11 and with so many lives getting affected, I want to move on but dont want to "forgive". I respect Gandhiji, but dont agree with giving away my other cheek for free to slap if someone finds me worthy of slapping!!! I may not slap back, agreed...but I will definitely remeber his slap forever unless I suffer from what Amitabh Bacchan suffered in "BLACK". Also Aman ki Asha, and bridging gap between the two countries...well atleast I dont have the guts to talk about these infront of Khushboo Jha or say the Kashmiri Pundits. I didnt quite find it interesting or even worth reading... rather my mind was more concentrating on what could have been saved if Aman ki Asha was not there.

First and foremost, we could save our environment...look at the amount of paper we are wasting on this "initiative". I have nothing against Pakistan, "the people". The people there are just like me. Infact I have a Pakistani colleague of mine and we were even friends on Facebook (till I defunced my FB id for some personal reason). But this Aman ki Asha or whatever, is pure waste. So my earnest request to TOI...dont waste paper on this at such a large scale please.

Secondly, its like playing with our emotions... give us a break. What you are asking us to do is forget the past and the present for a "dreamy" future"...sorry boss, thats not possible.

Am sure TOI is spending huge amount of money and resource in this initiative. They can utilize them for more pressing and urgent cause...they can infact open a camp for educating our "politicians"

And last but not the least...they can stop this "Emotioanl Atyachaar"...

Ode to our Government (Read any political party)

In Radio, TV etc, you always have this "dedicate a song" progrma...somehow I always found it funny...but nevertheless, today I want to dedicate a song to our beloved Government of India, and people running it. Here it goes...

One of Gandhi-ji's favourite songs is called "Vaishnav jan." It's always associated with him because he loved the lyrics and tried to follow those ideals. He also wanted to instill those ideas in all he met. He was honoured with the title "Father of India," and I'm sure he would have wanted his children to follow them. No, this post is not about him, as honestly, I am not his "die-hard" fan, but yes, I love some of the things he said/did/believed in...only some though.

The current crop of Indian Leaders (Gandhiji's children, if you may call them) think that they are honoring this great personality by bringing in his glasses and slippers back to India. So today, I want to dedicate a song which was Gandhiji's favorite to these political leaders, with a hope that they change their mind and start following this song in order to pay tribute to our "Father of the Nation"... and if not anything else, this will help us Indians in many ways...

Vaishnav jan to tene kahiye je, peed paraayi jaane re /Par dukhe upkaar kare toye, man abhimaan na aane re//

The true devotee [of God] is one who understands the pain of those who are not their own,
Always ready to help those who are unhappy, and does not let arrogance enter his mind.

If the government was really interested in honouring Gandhi-ji's memory, they should be able to understand the problems that the people are facing. I would say that the biggest problem that we are facing in India now is the ever rising prices of basic food products - rice, lentils, pulses... I mean, give us a break - thats common man's food after all. I would say these things take just a little bit of priority over making a huge noise about Gandhi-ji's things that he gave away during his lifetime and nobody cared about for at least 60 years.

Sakal lok maan sahune vande, ninda na karen keni re / Vaach kaach man nischal raakhe, dhan dhan janani teni re //

She bows to the whole world, does not criticise anybody, Words, deeds, and mind are kept pure, blessed is the mother who has such a child.

Well, this first bit the Indian government does really well. Bows to practically the whole world. "Oho, you want to come and blow up people here? No problem, please go ahead... consequences to you? None, don't worry... we will strongly condemn the acts but words have never hurt anyone. Do you mind if we blame the previous government for your actions? That way you can seem to be victims too!"
Their words are definitely unpure... deeds and minds alike. Mother India is not very blessed with most of the current leaders that we have. Mother India is silent, but how long will we, the people living here, be?

Sam-drishti ne trishna tyaagi, parastree jene maat re /
Jivaa thake, asatya na bole, par dhan nava jhaale haath re //

All are looked upon as equals, desire is abandoned, and he treats women as if they were his mother,
His tongue tires if he attempts to lie, he does not want other people's wealth.

I really wish the government would have this attitude. Right now, men and women are not looked upon equally, different castes are not looked upon equally, hell, ministers and public are not looked upon equally. Violence against women is a huge problem and their opportunities are still restricted in much of the country. Lies are the bread and butter of politics and stealing the taxpayers' money... that's an Olympic sport in itself. If only any of them bothers to read this blog... or if anyone of you know anyone of them...please let them know this song is dedicated to them.

Moh maaya vyape nahin jene, drudh vairaagya jena manmaa re /Ram naam shu taali laagi, sakal theerth tena tan ma re //

Desire and illusion don't hold him, he has detached himself from the world, The name of God is on his lips, all places of pilgrimage are in his body.

Government is very much attached to power, but not so much to the people who give them their power. Detachment is definitely there in them...from their people. They do use God to stay in power as much as possible... for some reason if God / religion is mentioned people forget rational thinking and hand over their brains. So instead of religion being something that unites, politicians use it to divide and the "we will protect you from them" seems to work better in the short term than "we'll get schools and electricity and water," of course the latter are much more difficult than the former, especially when there's nobody to protect against... other than goons who work for the politicians.

Vana lobhi ne kapat rachit chhe, kaam krodh nivaarya re / Bhane narsaiyyon tenu darshan kartaa, kul ekoter tarya re //

He has no deceit, no greed, has given up lust and anger,
If Narsi [the poet] is in the presence of such a person, his whole family will get salvation.

Government's definitely failed on all this... the bad side is shown to the people of the country, they're really nice to foriegners as far as I can tell.So, I'm asking those ministers who want to keep the memory of Mahatma Gandhi alive, take a page from his favourite poem and be that person... building statues, getting bits of memorabilia back won't keep his memory alive... as Gandhi-ji liked to say, "Be the change you want to see in the world," or at the very least, stop interfering with people who want to see change happen.

Relationships...

This is one of the most complicated aspect of life. And this is something that should have been the most simplest aspect of life. Human psychology is so damn complex. What we want we dont know, and this leads us to utter confusion.

Why am I babbling about this so late at night? When I see around myself, I dont see any couple happy with each other. Yes, I am talking about people I know, and true they are not enough to pass on a verdict for the entire world...but my world comprises of them. Am I really that unfortunate that couples I know, friends I care about... they dont seem to be happy with their partners at all?

Think of any possible disparity and I know someone or the other who is going through it at the moment. A friend of mine, got divorced recently. He wasnt happy when he was with his ex-wife, and he isnt happy now either...Is this love?

A firend of mine, having a lot of problems in her marriage... she thinks its worse than a broken family...they are together for the sake of thier child, but their togetherness is devoid of any meaning. They are not happy together, probably they wont be happy away from each other as well...Is this love?

A couple I know, are together, but keep on straying each other which is an open secret and probably an understanding amongst them. Apparently they are one happy family, but both the husband and the wife are having affairs outside their marriage. Is this love?

A colleague I know of, is having an extra marital affair with a widow and his wife has no clue about it. Is this love?

Another person I know is having a secret affair with her wife's best friend...and the wife doesnt have a clue about it...Is this love?

A long time friends of mine - I know of a couple who were madly in love, got married against all odds and now the guy is having an affair elsewhere. The wife knows but is quiet...Is this love?

Another firend of mine, though claims to be a perfect husband, wants to have an affair with his one-time girl-friend - an "affair" mind you...he doesnt want to marry her or anything - he wants to "sail" on both the boats... Is this love?

One of my acquaintance recently ommitted a suicide... am out of touch with him for long now, but other firends who were close told me that it has to do with his wife. Is this love?

A friend of mine is getting attracted to another guy outside her marriage as the "other" guy reminds her of her ex-boy friend! Ridiculous...Is this love?

And since all these above examples are from my firends circle - one can very well imagine that am talking about couples who have been together for minimum 10 years! Most of them have had love marriages... most of them "chose" to spend their lives with the chosen partner...n now this!

What do we look for, in a relationship? I think we ourselves are not sure what our expectations are - so we really cannot blame the other person for matching upto them. I want to ask all these friends of mine...why are they spoiling their lives like this? If they dont think they are spoiling their lives...then I want to ask them...why are they shattering my faith on "love"...why why why?

Am really heart broken now... I want to meet people who are happy in love...who are good examples of "love" and "relationships". Need some positivity to sustain my belief in "love". As I begin to "end" another day of my life... I pray to God, please show me one "true" love...a love that culminates into perfect bliss every moment...a relationship that has sustained many oddities and is still going strong... a love that is pure and makes two individuals proud of its existance. Let me re-affirm my belief that "love" is the only thing that gets you going...love that is selfless, egoless and makes you strong. Love is like "oxygen" - you just cannot live without it...let us have this oxygen in its purest form, God...

Today, am really hurt broken - result of an internal turmoil for long... need God to intervene and restore my faith. Show me one genuine relationship God...show me soon.

Hot-N-Cold Vienna

At times I crib about our country not being so advanced as in West. But this hot-n-cold treatment in Vienna made me realize that sometimes not having to stay in an advanced country helps - or may be that I am too used to be in a place which has never put me through freezing cold outdoor and burning hot indoor!!!

Vienna in October is cold cold cold!!! 10 days back when I had arrived here, it was freezing 3-4 degrees with rain/snow and a itchy wind. For the last some days, the waether changed completely - now its very nice - may be aroound 9-10 degrees, no rain and the wind has calmed down. This is a rare climate for Vienna in October, localites say... may be God did it for this special daughter of His, who He knows wouldnt have stood that weather for long (love to think it in this way!)...but whether its is 3-4 or 9-10 deg, its still cold. Sho when u are out u have to wear quite some winter accessories to protect yourself, including woolen gloves, mittens and hats. The irritating part comes when from outdoor you are venturing in some indoors - like your apartment of hotel... you have to start stripteasing the moment you are in! And this is no exaggeration. Because indorr it is warm! At times much more warmer than you would prefer. Say for instance, my Apartment...

Its hot hot hot.

Dark room, bright room. Closed windows, open windows. Heater on, heater off. And the last straw was yesterday, when I put the heater off, and a.c on. But my room takes pride in the fact that it is a perennial tandoor.

Shiva's third eye must be openning somewhere very near by.

So what happens is that when am indoor I am in a hot atmosphere -(right now, my a.c is on at 16 deg but somehow the room temperature is showing as 27 deg! I was taking a nice Sunday afternoon nap and when I woke up 10 mins back I found myself in a pool of sweat!!! And now, am planning to go out for a walk and I feel like rebelling this hot-n-cold torture by not putting on any winter garment at all...!!!

Hypocricy!

I am a hypocrit! Yes I am. otherwise how do you explain my blog on this topic? The fact that am writing about it so late proves that i am a hypocrite...

Or may be am not. May be I was just trying to run away from the idea of facing it. When I was a kid, i used to play a very stupid game. I would close one eye and with my hand up i would blot the sun...n I used to think that I could cover up the sun with my hands! This i think, has remained with me. Things I dont want to face, I cover them by actually deciding not to think about them at all - but they exist dont they? I just choose to ignore...

I hate shallow people, people without depth, meaning and purpose in life. I feel their heart is nothing more than a pumping machine and they prefer it that way. Their superficiality amazes me...stupid cliched' talks, unimaginative and predictable approach towards life... they are like these species whose only aim in this life is to exist...not live, but exist...these are the people without feelings and humanity, without love and care.

But they know all about "putting up a show". Thats precisely why you will see them show a completely different picture of themselves to the whole world, which is why it is very difficult to recognise them in the first place. Like they may be having a 101 affairs outside their marriage, but behave so abnomally perfectly with thier spouse that probably that poor soul will never be able to even make out whats going on behind his/her back! Like they may be having a world war scene at home every day, but while out in their "society" they would behave like this perfect "couple" you would wish to be like!

They are everywhere around us - fake people...in your office, in your neighbourhood, everywhere, whether you know them or not, they exist. They exist in every form and shape. Now they are not at all the stereotype villains! Oh no they are not...they are the so called good examples of our society... successful, polish, well mannered and to top it all well-educated. The degrees that they are porud of, the achievements they can boast of --- and underneath all those socially admirable layers?... a shallow person!

He can be your boss whom there are so many people admiring or looking upto. He is successful no doubt, he is efficient no doubt...but he may be faking his emotions or cheating on his wife - you wouldnt just get the slightest hint of it. He can be your husband whom you just adore...think he loves you so much as he never forgets to get you flowers on your birthday and never does anything wrong to offend you. But you will prbably never get to know that all those flowers were brought to you to divert your attention from something that he doesnt want you to know.

Just remembered a story which you all know - we have heard it so many times when we were kids and tld this to all kids we ever interacted with who kept on demanding stories from us--- it goes on like this -

A king once met a monkey who wanted to be the king's body guard. The king agreed and gave him a sword. One day when the king was sleeping and the monkey was sitting besides him protecting him, he saw a bee on the king's nose. The monkey put the sword right though, and cut off the king's nose...and there was the king without a nose.

The moral of the story is --- a monkey will always remain a monkey, a betrayer will always reamin a betrayer. A monkey cannot be a savior with a sword and a betrayer cannot be your "well-wisher" with your love.

Its on us to realize this and not expect a monkey to protect us or a betrayer to love us, right?...So we all are hypocrites...we know this story, we know the lesson, but we block ourselves from the truth...just as a kid I would block the sun by closing eyes... so then who is a hypocrite? I... I am the biggest ever hypocrite who thinks a monkey can be a savior, only if you give him 1 last chance...

Missing the radio of my car

Am missing my car...and particularly the radio in it - for it is undobtedly my best friend and gives me good company for minimum 2 hours everyday, 5 days a week, unless Mamata didi calls a bandh in Kolkata. I love music - the listenning side of it. Well, I also love singing but my neighbours dont entertain me, so I have restricted myself to the listenning part of it. The radio of my car is my only mode of listenning to music - yes, actually listenning to music is banned at my place - there is (un)fortunately only one home theatre system and the TV as well as Cd/dvd player and/or radio plays through that same god damn it set ( i think they call it a receiver or something like that). And that is co-owned by my daughter and her father. And they have banned all forms of only audible recreations at home .Its strictly audio-visual...and visual also is decided by them most of the time (well, I think all the time). So I am not privileged enough to listen to music at home.

I dont repent. Because my Radio takes care of this passion of music. And provides me with a great sense of achievment as well. You see, when you get something after a strenuous effort, the pleasure is always more. Likewise, when I want to listen to the music I turn the knob of my radio and it croaks out music at a pitch of its choice depending on which direction is my car moving and/or the antaenna is pointing to...and that too not instantly as i turn the knob on. Many days it takes about 2-4 minutes to get started. Out of frustation often I whack it on its head and he promptly obliges me. And then after almost 5-10 mintues of ruthna - manana my radio sings out - the satisfaction that it gives me cannot be compared with the best of music systems in the world.

My radio has a mind of its own. He decides for me which station he wants me to listen to. I am not sure about whether it has any secret tie-ups with any of these stations, or whether is it a free lance thing - but whatever it is the geast of the matter is that it decides - I dont mind because for me getting to hear whatever channel he pleases itself is a luxury beyond my dream. This absolute daily pleasure is something that i am missing here very much.

The home theatre reminds me of the complexity of life now a days. And I thought science and technology makes your life easier. Life is not at all simple with these hi-fi gadjets these days. Take the equipment called "receiver" itself. If you have a lot of audio/video players and you want them to learn sharing and caring and thus buy in the equipment called "receiver" so that they all share the same speakers, then you need a Receiver. In other words, a Receiver is a piece of equipment which accepts input from several audio/video sources and outputs nothing. It is an entertainment device though most of the entertainment is ruined while setting and conncting it up.

My daughter is better of with all these gadjets than me. I remember once I was in a guest house in Delhi and the room had a TV and a music system and had 3 remotes and some peculiar combination of switching them on in order to be able to watch TV or listen to music. It had taken me half an hour to figure out the i was holding the remotes upside down. Not that it made any sense to me the right side up, and not that I could succeed in switching the TV on. It so happened that I had stayed there for a month and every day after coming back from office I would call up room service to switch on my TV and would keep it on till the next day till the time I left for office. So you see, life is not at all simple with all these inventions. I never had any problem with the first black n white TV we had at home when I was a kid. I could easily switch it on and roll the know to get the two and a half channels that it aired! Now with 250 + channels I get thoroughly confused with TV.

So you see, what i was saying is that I miss my radio. N now am in a room all alone by myself. It has a huge tv set and fortunately only one remote to operate it. All my hurdles are overcome. No body can disturb me listenning to music and watching television...but alas, even then am unable to watch or listen...you wonder why? Because there is hardly any English channel out here, forget my good old Hindi channels...its only local channels - and I ahve no clue what they talk about.

So...am missing my radio and am missing my car...one more reason why am counting my days to go back...as if I didnt have enough!

I want to grow old with you

This is one phrase i have read in many M&B books and even otherwise. I always found it very romantic. If some is still not sure about what I am saying here, well its kind of a marriage proposal... it goes on like this - I love you, I want to marry you, I wanna have kinds with you, I want to grow old with you...will u marry me? And then the girls gives a million dollar answer - Yes! (well a million-dollar answer I say bcos after that the guy ends up spending all his million dollars he has on her for the rest of their live, until death or divorce do them apart) But thats not the main point here. The main point is that phrase - I want to grow old with you.

Why all of a sudden am talking about this? Well simply because being in Vienna at the moment I am getting an opportunity to see a lot of elderly couples these days. They make a sweet pair. They are on their vacation, mostly alone, and they seem to be enjoying each others' company thoroughly. I get to meet them every day during the breakfast in the hotel. I particularly like them... because they hve indeed grown old with each other but are not bored of each other - something that I see in the elderly couples of our country, and that includes my parents, my in-laws as well. Are they not in love? Am sure they are, but they surely are not as expressive as these people from the otherside of the world are.

They hold hands and walk together - I have never seen my parents walking side by side, forget holding hands. Men in our country prefer walking atleast 100 miles ahead of their female counterparts! Check out on your parents, on your uncle-aunts, am sure you will notice this trend without any exception (and incase you do find any exception, please let me know - I would love to meet such a lovely couple in our country as well!) They sit together and have breakfast - our mothers have this tendency of feeding their "husbands" first! and the husbands also are too happy to have the meal before their wives! These elderly couples are enjoying theri lives...hassle free, tension free, roaming around the world. But look at our parents - can they even think of going for a vacation - only the two of them, leaving us behind? Oh am sure the mothers will dies at the thought of leaving their grown up kids, and the fathers will faint at the thought of being alone with their wives for 7-10 days! When circumstance forces them to travel together (and believe me, its mostly emergency not a vacation - like they going to their son or daughter's place who stay in a different city/country) - they travel as if they are absolute strangers!!! or enemies bonded together. The day I was travelling to Vienna from Kolkata, I met an aunty in the bus towrds the air-craft, who, according to herself was travelling with her husband to UK where her son stays, but believe me I couldnot even trace the uncle - Aunty was busy toking to me, she was excited as it was her first time, and when I asked her, "Are you traveeling alone", she said, "Na na, tomar kaku o ache amar shonge" - this is another amazing thing about our mothers and aunts - they will die but not call their husbands by their names! My mother wanted to pass this on to me, I had very politely(my version of politeness) refused! Anyways, coming back to this aunty, when she told me that "my kaku" was also there, I strated looking for him, then she said , "ei ekhanei kothao hobe"!

I see my father-in-law always shouting at my mother-in-law or scolding her when they are travelling together - as if she just cannot do anything right!

I love my India, but these are the things that disturbs me - we dont know how to respect another human being, more so if that human being is our better half! This is in our blood. We love to shout at each other. In the western part, they may have more divorces...but if they are together, they are in love. And if they are in love, and while they are in love, they treat each other well.

I learnt from this elderly couples, what it is like to grow old together gracefully and lovingly...not like growing old together because we have no options. In India coupls are like that...they are together because they have no options...are they still in love? They might like to ask this question to themselves.

Coming back to elderly couples, well, I like them immensely in this part of the world. They are indeed growing old together... God bless them.

And as I sit in my hotel room, all alone, writing this...I wonder silently... Will I really grow old with him...together? like these people out here...or will my mother be successful in passing on the heir... i wonder will i hold his hand when am walking on the road, or will he be miles ahead of me... i wonder will we call each other sweetheart and darling... or will we even not bother to call each other...

The more I wonder, the more Doris Day takes over me...Que Serra Serra...

Conference Calls

Canada. California. New York. Armonk. Mexico. And, to ice the cake, Bangalore. The conference call was scheduled to start at 9:30 in the morning, and at 9:29, I realized that the phone in the corner of my desk did not have an international calling facility. I was sitting there, all prepared, my papers spread out in front of me, my pen handy, my head going over the different methods of opening the conversation, saying “Hi” or “Hello” or “Good morning”, and then, I sat there listening to the sweet yet hideous female voice telling me that this service isn’t available on this phone.

I wondered what to do. The clock ticked away the seconds of the one minute left for me to sign into the call. I gulped and took a decision that I knew I’d regret. I flipped open my mobile and punched in the numbers. I prayed hard, hoping the call would end in a few minutes. It didn’t. It lasted for an hour and fifty minutes. I sighed and resigned myself for a fat bill this month. The recession time has hit our Industry big time. Companies are on cost cutting mode... but what about the poor employees? Am still dreading the time I will see the bill for this month....

Conference calls, according to me, are a supreme waste of time. I think more work can be accomplished through an email. The first twenty minutes are obviously spent in introducing all the people in the call. The next thirty-odd minutes go away in outlining the agenda for the conference call. The remaining hour or so is spent in asking people to speak up; apologizing for loud cell phones; apologizing for the rackets behind their respective backs; and finally, asking everyone present if they understood the last point. More often than not, there will be at least three jerks who would not have paid attention, and they would ask you to repeat the last point.

The frustrating thing about these conference calls is that you cannot abuse anyone verbally. If the same meeting is held over emails, then before sending each and every email, you can let out the wonderful stream of expletives, and feel good about yourself and the other person’s lack of knowledge. You can question his/her ability to think straight, his/her man-/womanhood, his/her ridiculous name, and lot of other things. But on a conference call, you have to hold your tongue and treat even the most outrageous of jerks with an amount of respect. It takes so much out of you. You can’t even make fun of funny names!

Anyway, I have had too many conference calls till now. I think I’ve devised a formula to survive each one of them. I call it “Apparent Indifference” - if you give the impression to the other jerks on the call that you’re indifferent about the outcome, then they’ll fall over themselves to spell out each and ever point of concern and make sure that each and every doubt has been answered. This, of course, helps me in making the meeting a success.

Oh, I hate conference calls. Of course, the only advantage the conference call has over board-room meetings is that you can fart loudly and get away with it... but having said that I have never enjoyed this experience much, only because I hate the idea of farting in public - with one exception - my husband! He is excused, i love him too much to feel irritated about this one (of the innumerable) bad habbit of his :-)

I Hate You!!!

We all hate somebody. It’s in our blood. We can’t help but hate a few people, and in certain special circumstances, we hate someone so much that we are prepared to do anything to make their lives miserable. Irrespective of our religious beliefs, line of work, nationality or faith, we hate people.

We hate a few because of the way they talk. We hate a few more because of the way they laugh. Sometimes, their reactions to a few situations make our blood boil. Some people’s tastes in music makes us want to tear our hair out in frustration. We don’t like the way some people dress. We hate it when some people crowd around us, invading our personal space. We hate some people for the kind of emails they send. We hate some people because they say, “Reeeealy??” in a very very irritating manner for every little statement we make. We hate some people who lie. We hate a few for being mean and heartless. We hate people who make false promises. Sometimes, very rarely, we hate someone just because they exist.

What can we do when we bump into such people? I’d suggest the straight-forward means of screaming into their faces, “I hate you!” but this may not go down well with most people. The other, subtle non-violent way of pissing them off is to write them a Hate Mail. Something like "You Suck!!!" But nowadays, the same two words have a very erotic implication, and isn’t used much often. Anyways...

Instead, you can resort to a more flowery longhand version - the email. If you are brave enough, you can send the mail from your own email ID, otherwise you could take the trouble to create a new email ID called something like ihateyourballs@gmail.com or something more subtle like a.hole@gmail.com. and send out Hate Mails to the objects of your hatred.

I don’t really suggest you do this, because such incriminating emails have a very strong possibility of being mistaken for the work of a terrorist or worse, the HR Managers. So, I suggest you send Hate Mails from your own email ID, because as they say in Hindi, “Nafrat kiya toh darna kya?” (Why fear if you hate?)

Be your flowery best, use words like fornication and obfuscation and make them believe that you’re praising them. For example, “Your ability to obfuscate others is awe-inspiringly fornicative!” will actually make him/her feel proud. Only when the person refers to a dictionary will he/she get your drift.

The best Hate Mails are written as part of the final goodbye emails that you write while leaving an organization. People are expecting the usual sentimental shit and you give them that: “My time here in this great organization was an anachronism - a testament to my patience.”

So, let’s be prepared to send out those email that you’ve always saved in drafts and never had the guts to send. And let the man/woman know how much you love to hate him/her!